Going solo - Tips for surviving the wedding season minus a plus one...
We’re halfway through Lent, daffodils are appearing, crème egg adverts have begun and wedding season is approaching.
Here at Honoured, we know that attending weddings as a single person can feel both daunting and a bit disheartening but we want to encourage you that it doesn’t have to be this way!
If you’re going with lots of other single friends or it’s a big family do, then weddings tend to be just a great knees-up with your closest, whilst you watch two people vow to never date anyone else for the rest of their life.
I’ve been to some of these weddings in the past few years and they have just truly been a good time.
But I’ve also been to those weddings where you really only know the bride or the groom and perhaps one other person that you don’t really speak to.
They can be awkward. But perhaps more awkward was the wedding I attended where I was seated on an actual singles table… why do people do this?? (If you have had a good experience on a singles table, do get in touch, I’d love to hear the story!).
So, drawing on my experience of attending weddings of the last few years, here’s a few top tips that might help all of you get the most of this wedding season…
The key I’ve found with arriving at the wedding ceremony, is not to arrive too early (especially if you don’t know many people going). This allows everyone else to find their seats with their friends and you can just slip in after…
just try and make it in before the bride!
Ultimately, in the ceremony, you don’t need to know the people you’re sat with – most weddings don’t have much audience participation.
Also, ask an usher if they have specific bride/groom sides, that way you’re more likely to have something in common with the people you’re sat next to.
Finding your seat
If you’re going to the main part of the wedding reception, the chances are you’ll have been seated at a table (though this is becoming increasing irregular).
My top tip for this is try and be as relaxed as possible.
Take your time, the bride and groom won’t be there for a while. If you’re the first person to turn up to your table, either take this opportunity to grab a drink or just look around the room. The moment you take out your phone and scroll, you tell the room you’re not interested in conversation (taking pictures don’t count).
Always have a question or conversation starter up your sleeve. The usual is “So how do you know the bride and groom?” or “How far did you have to travel today?”
They are so classically British but they work. No matter whether the weather has been good or bad, both can work in your favour for conversation.
Also, make sure you have a drink in your glass to toast with. I went to a wedding this January and completely forgot to fill my glass. Every time they said ‘Cheers’, I tapped my glass against another and then pretended to drink from my empty cup.
The Dance Floor
Weddings vary on this – some don’t have dancing at all, for others it’s a big part of the night. Recently, I’ve been to weddings with a ceilidh (barn dance) and this makes it really easy to get up and have a good time. There’s always plenty of dances that don’t require you to have a partner.
For the disco weddings out there, if you’re a dancer, don’t let the fact that you don’t know many people stop you! Wait until your favourite song comes on (or request it) and just start dancing! You will soon bond with the other feet shifters up there.
None of these things can be particularly easy, but remembering the reason I’m there always helps.
You have been especially invited to an event where two people have vowed their lives to each other – and they wanted you to be part of the day and to be yourself.
I used to slightly dread getting a wedding invite because it just reminded me of how single I am, and how I’m not even close to getting married.
Now, I leave weddings celebrating that I’m single, free and going back to a big hotel double bed all to myself!
The truth is, everyone can celebrate love, no matter their marital status.
So, whether you’re looking for love or happy being single, we hope you have a great wedding season!